Help! I'm a Fish (2000)

Film: Help! I'm a Fish
Alternate title: A Fish Tale
Release: 2000, theatrical
Starring: Alan Rickman, Terry Jones, Aaron Paul
Directed by: Stefan Fjeldmark Michael Hegner Greg Manwaring 

IMDB page: Link opens in a new window

Description: When three kids sneak out for a fishing trip, an accident involving a strange potion and a nutty professor turn them into aquatic animals. They have to get the antidote before 48 hours has passed or they'll be sea creatures forever!

Hans' thoughts:

This movie was a very big deal when it came out. It was a fully-fledged Disney-like Danish produced animation. While Denmark has certainly produced animated movies before, never to this extent. 

So you have this pretty cool setup, three kids encounter a friendly but bumbling professor and through unfortunate events they end up turned into aquatic animals and thrown into the sea. Well, I say aquatic animals but through the movie all three of them are referred to simply as "fish". This is strange, considering that only one of them are actually turned into an actual fish. The two others are turned into a starfish and a jellyfish. I know the word "fish" is in their names but that doesn't actually make them.. oh you don't care.

The strongest point of this movie is it's visuals. Well-deserving of the setting of the sea, this movie has some beautiful sceneries and visuals. At times, this movie get's considerably dark, the villains live in a sunken freight ship which lends itself really well to some absolutely grim imagery. The high-point of this being a scene in which Joe, played by Alan Rickman, has his villain song. It draws a lot of parallels to nazi germany, north korea and soviet russia. You see, the potion that would just have served as an antidote to the kids actually works to make normal sea creatures more intelligent. It's not very plausible but it makes for a nice plot device. 

The songs in the movie is well.. it was made in 2000, so you get a lot of 90's Europop in there. There are two songs sung by actual characters in the movies, but they could be so much better. I have to admit, I'm not really a fan of Alan Rickmans singing voice compared to the Danish version. Rickman has this very pronounced voice that's easy to recognize but it just doesn't lend itself to singing in deep monotone. If you want to hear Alan Rickman singing considerably well, go check out Sweeney Todd.

All in all, I consider this movie to be fiercely underrated, certainly better than some of the Disney movies that came out at the same time (Pocahontas spring to mind). However, that isn't really saying much. You can take this as proof that European animators know their trade just as well as Japanese or American.Kids will probably love it though.

Titan A.E (2000)

Film: Titan A.E.
Release: 2000, Theatrical
Starring: Matt Damon, Bill Pullman, Drew Barrymore
Directed by: Don Bluth, Gary Goldman
IMDB Page: Link opens in a new window
Description: After the destruction of Earth by the Drej-empire, humanity's last hope is a map hidden in the genetic code of a young man who wants nothing to do with it.

Hans' thoughts:

I honestly have a hard time deciding whether I liked this movie. While the story is certainly good, somewhat lifted from the biblical tale of Noah's ark, it suffers greatly from lack of padding. This could have been saved by either cutting the intro sequence or splitting the story into more than one movie. Instead what we have is a movie with a lot of interesting concepts, beautiful visuals but characters that are just kinda, there. Here's an example of what I mean, the main character is supposed to have been brought up by an alien character. This character is in the intro sequence, but by the end of the first 15 minutes of the movie the character is completely gone. Never to be mentioned or heard from again. We're supposed to believe that the main character has some sort of established relationship with the alien, but we never see the alien actually do something remarkable at all. It just kinda leaves the movie. Visually, the movie is very pretty. Don Bluth movies are almost always stunning animation-vise. Unfortunately the 3D graphics are kind of hit and miss. Some times they look absolutely stunning, unfortunately most of time it's just kind of distracting, if it doesn't outright ruin the picture. This isn't however a case of me being spoiled by modern technology, but more the fact that the movie is plastered with 3D effects even when it doesn't need them. So should you watch this movie? Well, it depends. It's a curious little piece that's very typical of it's era, around this time Disney movies such as Treasure Planet and Atlantis: The Lost Empire came out. If you like this kind of high adventure science fiction there may be something for you here, just don't expect a masterpiece as this movie falls just short of being good and ends up kind of bland.

Joseph: King of Dreams (2000)

Film: Joseph: King of Dreams
Release: 2000, video
Starring: Ben Affleck, Mark Hamill, Richard Herd
Directed by: Rob LaDuca, Robert C. Ramirez
IMDB Page: Link opens in a new window

Description: Joseph is the youngest of a huge group of brother but gets special treatment from his parents. After a while the brothers come to be so jealous that they sell him as a slave and send him to Egypt.

Hans' thoughts:

This is a sort-of sequel to the very stellar movie Prince of Egypt. Despite what I assume was good intentions, this movie turns out incredibly bland. It retells the biblical myth of Joseph, and like Prince of Egypt it tries to play big on the brotherly aspect of the story. But Prince of Egypt succeeds in making the two main characters act as brothers put in that sort of situation would, Joseph: King of Dreams just sort of mentions that: Oh yeah right, these guys are brothers. Honestly, everything in this movie is very bland. The music is as frequent as the previous movie but very forgettable (as opposed to the amazing soundtrack of it's predecessor). The voice actors, even the big names like Ben Affleck and Mark Hamill seem uninterested in their perfomances as well. The character models are also weird and some of the side characters seem downright bizarre. I especially recall a guardsman who looked like a piece of beef on tiny legs. Everything also seem rushed, one minute Joseph is in prison and the next he's governing the country. At least the backgrounds are very well done and the dream sequences are beautifully animated. Unfortunately, it just can't save this very forgettable little movie.

Romeo Must Die (2000)

Film: Romeo Must Die
Release: 2000, theatrical
Starring: Jet Li, Aaliyah, Delroy Lindo
Directed by: Andrzej Bartkowiak
IMDB page:  Link opens in a new window
Description: The Hong Kong based cop Han Sing took the blame for a crime he didn't commit and sits in prison. However, he quickly escapes when he gets word of his younger brother death in Oakland, California and heads to investigate.

Hans' thoughts:

Every place I've checked lists this movie as a modern adaptation of Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet. If this is the case, the connection is very loose. While the story is surprisingly simple, I was actually thrown off guard by the ending of this movie. Sure, the villainous characters all seem villainous. But truth be told, that goes for all the characters except the male and female lead. I'm assuming this is where the Romeo & Juliet connection comes from. This movie, story-wise is also very typical of it's era. It's like getting served a little piece of late 90's nostalgia, along with all the things it had. Silly comedic reliefs (the "shrieking black man trope" is strong in this one courtesy of comedian Anthony Anderson), hip hop and R&B music (the female lead is literally played by a R&B singer making her acting debut) and over the top Kung fu action (This was Jet Li's breakout film). When it comes to the actual acting however, the older actor is doing the best job. I'd like to highlight Delroy Lindo as the father character whom I thought did a really great job. Of course you have to highlight the action this film, Jet Li is in tip top shaped and action movie lovers will have plenty of reasons to sit with their jaws on the floor. If you're into simple plots and stunning action, this is a must see.